When you jump in with both feet, the feeling is exhilarating and terrifying, like the shock of ice cold water.

But as Laura at Cottage Copy writes, when the first thrilling high of deciding to take on a new challenge wears off, you’re often left with… nothing. No idea what to say or do next. A cold, lonely feeling in the pit of your stomach.

It’s an “Oh, shit” moment: WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO NOW?

Tell me about it. I’m on that roller coaster every day. I get all excited about another great idea, tweet and blog about it, tell all my friends — and then I have to follow through. I go blank EVERY TIME.

That’s what The Complete Flake is all about, really. It started as a great idea, and thus began the sickening ride of exhilarated highs and panic-stricken lows.

So I’m going to wager that you will hit a wall at some point during this challenge. Maybe it’s already happened, or maybe you’re still at the top of the roller coaster. If you haven’t hit it yet, just know that you can come back here and read this again when it does.

I hit my panic point on Sunday, the day before the challenge was to begin.

Suddenly, there was that old familiar, sinking feeling that I had no idea what to say or do next. Usually when that happens, I do anything I can think of to avoid dealing with it — web surf, tweet, compulsively play sudoko, even wash the dishes. But this time, I did something different.

I reached out and told someone what I was feeling.

And David Crandall said exactly what I needed to hear:

Just take a deep breath and write with love. Since we want people to love THEIR people we just pour out love on them. I totally believe you can do this or I would never have approached you. I’ve seen your writing and know you rock. You were online before people knew there was an online. You own this shit! ๐Ÿ˜‰

The compliments felt great, but it was these words that made the difference: “Just take a deep breath and write with love.”

David and I had talked about how we wanted to conduct the challenge, and we decided that the whole point was LOVE.

When you act out of love, you just, kindasorta know what to say. It’s funny that way.

Well, okay — the compliments helped too, I can’t lie. And that’s the other point I want to make: when you hit your wall during this challenge, however many times you hit it, reach out for support. Accept the love that’s coming back to you.

Ask, and allow, others to help you, encourage you, love you.

Ask here in the comments, or at the #customerlove hashtag, or from your IRL [In Real Life] family or friends — but ask. Tell someone what you’re feeling.

We all feel that way. And we all need a support network, especially when we’re doing something ridiculously, insanely awesome.

Your action step for today is to support each other — or ask for support, if you need it.

  • Offer to help.
  • Ask for help if you need it.
  • Accept help.
  • Cheer each other on.
  • Pour love on each other.

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Showing 16 comments
  • Marlene Hielema
    Reply

    When we show that love to our blog readers, customers, students, who ever, then they feel it, it’s genuine and they respond so much better.

    Thanks for bringing this all back to the basics. I can feel the love!

  • Wilson Usman
    Reply

    Excellent idea, I think without good people around us we wouldn’t be able to do great things. Sometimes that’s what we need someone there to keep us focused and support us when we need them or vice-versa.

  • Steve
    Reply

    I just found out about your blog from Srini Rao. This is good stuff! I subscribed, I think. When I hit the subscribe button, nothing happened. Is it supposed to?

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    Hi Steve! I’m so glad you’re here — but not at all glad to hear nothing
    happened when you hit the subscribe button. Yikes. Was it the one under the
    Advance Discount list in the upper right corner? You should have gotten some
    kind of confirmation by email. Let me know so I can troubleshoot. And thanks
    for the heads’ up!

    ~LaVonne

  • Kokomolady
    Reply

    Wonderful post LaVonne and here is the perfect place to insert a quote from my favorite author, Robert A. Heinlein: “The more you love, the more you CAN love- and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how MANY you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
    Cheers to love and especially your customerlove challenge. Thanks ๐Ÿ™‚

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    Hi Wilson! I didn’t realize until I started writing this post that NOT
    having a support system was a big reason I’ve been struggling with writer’s
    block and resistance. But now I do have support, from David and you and all
    the other commentors, and Twitter followers…

    I love the internets!

    ~LaVonne

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    MWAH!!!!

    ~LaVonne

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    Ooh, great quote, thanks! The idea of just LOVING lots of people sounds so
    corny and unhip, but it’s actually the coolest thing there is. And it
    touches a deep chord in all of us, I think. I’m just an old hippie who
    really believed in all that stuff, lol.

    ~LaVonne

  • Anonymous
    Reply

    You continue to rock, LaVonne. I have a feeling that there is going to be a lot of transformation happening as part of this challenge – to more than our pocketbooks.

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    It’s amazing, isn’t it? I’m just watching the tweets and marvelling. ๐Ÿ™‚

    ~LaVonne

  • Abby Kerr
    Reply

    Oh, yes. The “oh, sh*t” moment. In my life, I’ve had “oh, sh*t” seasons. {Anyone else experience this?} In my observation, it happens anywhere from 3 months to one year after launching a business. You suddenly realize, “OK, I’ve built this ship. Now how do I steer it?” I love the advice David gave me: take a deep breath and write with love. YES.

    And big Amens to what Susan T. Blake says, below: “I have a feeling that there is going to be a lot of transformation happenings as part of this challenge – to more than our pocketbooks.”

    I can’t wait to see how this unfolds. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • LaVonne Ellis
    Reply

    I’ve had “oh, sh*t” DECADES. In fact, I feel like my whole life has been one
    long “oh, sh*t” moment. [With one exception, which I’ll blog about someday.]

    Yes, David’s advice was about as perfect as it gets. I might just do that in
    cross stitch and hang it over the monitor.

    The transformation already is amazing! Can’t even fathom what we’ll see when
    it’s all over. Except it won’t be over, will it? lol

    ~LaVonne

    • Abby Kerr
      Reply

      Damn right it won’t be over! I have a feeling we’re creating the new normal around here. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Anonymous
      Reply

      I love your honesty LaVonne – and, like you, there are times that I feel like my whole life is one big “oh, sh*t” moment lol.

      And speaking of transformation . . . first your #2500wds challenge starts an incredible mastermindish and fabulous writing family and now look at what you and David are doing. When we admit our struggles, we connect on a deeper level and we’re able to build these amazing relationships. Just because they are not necessarily off-line relationships doesn’t make them any less real and powerful.

  • Anonymous
    Reply

    I’m a bit behind in my reading and I’ve mentioned this already on Twitter but I love what you’re doing with this. Even though I’m not directly participating in the challenge I love what you and David are doing ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m a big fan even if I’m not always around to say it!!

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