The book Switch by Chip & Dan Heath is all about change. The subtitle says it better than I can: How to Change Things When Change is Hard. I want to make some hard changes.
I HAVE been making big changes in my life, though, and not giving myself credit, thus breaking my own rule of giving lots of praise. So here is some praise for all the work I have already done on fundamentally changing my own life in many big and small ways:
1. I have completely changed my diet slowly over several years and established healthy eating habits. This is HUGE. I never thought I’d be able to do that, seriously. I have always been completely undisciplined, especially when it comes to food. I was a junk food addict starting with my mom’s first diner, when she brought home hamburgers, fries and milkshakes for dinner. So far I’ve managed to quit: Diet Coke, chocolate, caffeine, ice cream [my big addiction after caffeine], sugar, gluten, and dairy. I recently went vegan, but I had some chicken last night that was in the freezer and I will eat the other meat that’s in there; won’t buy any more. I eat mostly organic, unprocessed, whole foods. I’m very proud of myself for making these changes and teaching myself how to live in a completely different, healthy way. And yes, I feel a LOT better. Yay, me!
2. I make my bed every morning when I wake up. Never did this until a couple of months ago, and it makes a big difference in the way I feel about the day, because my desk is right next to the bed. Yay, me! [I am consciously avoiding any ‘buts’ in this list like, “Now if only I could keep the desk clean.” That comes later.]
3. I’m getting better at keeping the dishes done, reminding myself that I don’t have to go back to the computer while waiting for those delicious beans to cook; I can do the dishes and other kitchen duties instead. Yay, me!
4. I am refusing to accept my frequent anxiety attacks over this business stuff as the truth. I feel the anxiety but I trust, from experience, that it will pass. And it does. The old me would have decided it was hopeless and given up. Not any more. Yay, me!
5. Totally forgot: I quit smoking years ago by first making a rule that I couldn’t smoke at home, then while commuting to work, and finally stopped completely. This took a couple of weeks and wasn’t very hard at all. Yay, me!
These are the big ones that I know are real changes. There won’t be any more significant backsliding with these. There’s another list of items I am working on, and still more that I plan to work on, but I wanted to pat myself on the back first [and yes, you may pat my back too.]
So back to Switch: one of the strategies for change that the authors talk about is building “instant habits” by setting up what they call action triggers — for instance, telling yourself that you will do X when Y happens. They found studies that show truly amazing results from such a simple idea.
I realized while reading about action triggers that I’ve used them already: I promised myself I would make the bed first thing in the morning, and after some false starts, now I do; things just don’t feel right until my bed is made. I decided to do kitchen cleanup duty while my food is cooking. Not quite there yet, but the dishes are much less of a problem for me now — and now that I ‘get’ the whole action trigger thing, I think this will be a habit very soon.
I’m eager to try action triggers for other behaviors that I want to become instant habits, such as:
1. I’ve set up my browser to open to 750words.com to remind me to write first thing every morning when I fire up Ole’ Betsy — and lo and behold, I am writing! 🙂 My rule is to write 750 words before I check email or Twitter, my two biggest productivity downfalls. Since I want to write 2500 words a day, I need to put another action trigger in place, maybe requiring me to shut down the browser for lunch and dinner, thus setting myself up to seeing 750words.com twice more in the day. [750 x 3 adds up to 2250, not quite there, but it will be easy to get to the end when I only have 250 words to go.] I also set a 5-minute timer for both breaks and writing. I can always go longer for writing, but never for breaks. Still working on that one.
2. I need to reinforce the dishes-while-waiting habit, so I think I’ll make it a rule to clean up whenever I’m listening to NPR, which I always do when I’m in the kitchen [hmm, so being in the kitchen is already an action trigger for turning on the radio — interesting.]
3. And I’m embarrassed to tell you this, but I’m lazy about brushing my teeth; I only do it in the morning. I want to brush before bed too but I keep forgetting, so I need an action trigger to remind me. I know: turning off the computer. Yes, it’s true, I keep the computer on from the time I get up until I go to bed, so turning it off would be the perfect action trigger.
4. Now that I think about it, I would like to create a whole going-to-bed routine that would involve a) clearing off my desk, b) checking the kitchen to make sure all food is put away and dishes are done, and c) brushing my teeth. That’s a bit much to expect all at once, so I’ll break it down to smaller pieces and work on them one at a time.
Yay, me!
What action trigger can you set up to help you establish one “instant habit?” Tell me in the comments below. Yay, you!
Image credit: greg.turner
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Hey Lavonne…
So glad I found your blog – and I *love* the name!
We seem to have a lot in common – including writing about habits on the same day.
I struggle with maintaining new habits over time. And yet, like you, I've managed to make some pretty big, positive (and permanent) changes in my life.
The teeth thing? Me too. I've also been in and out of the habit of flossing for what seems like a zillion times. And you'd think that would be a fairly easy trigger – to combine with brushing.
Anyhow, I think I'll go make my bed now 🙂 (another habit I've been in and out of over the years)
And YAY YOU for all the positive change (and for praising yourself)!
Thanks for a great post. Habits are so hard to change! I can do something for months and start getting complacent because I think it's a habit… then bam, it's gone again!
This is an awesome way of approaching change 🙂 I'm going to leave my running clothes on my desk every morning to remind myself to do some exercise before turning on the computer 🙂
Hooray for you!! You rock!
You have done (and are doing) amazing, awesome things!! Plus, you figured out how to “trigger” stuff, which can be a tough connection to make.
Never heard about 750words.com – now I'm a member.
I'm just SO proud of you!!!!
Love, me
One thing I do at the end of the day is pull out a large post-it pad and write down 4-5 things I need to do for the next day. Work items. It isn't my standard to-do list. It's just a mini list of stuff that should get done and I put it on top of my work stack. That way first thing it is in my view. I have to move it to begin the day so I have to look at it and process it before I do anything else. It helps me to tackle stuff I might normally put off. Granted not everything gets done but usually all but one thing does.
You've come a long way! Your big changes are big changes and you definitely deserve a big Wahoo!
This wasn't an action trigger but I found it got a lot of use. I quit cokes by telling myself, “I don't drink cokes.” I was drinking 6-8 20 oz cokes a day. No lie. Really deciding to quit was probably the main factor, but I frequently found myself standing in front of a coke machine with a dollar in my hand and I'd hear my voice in my head, “I don't drink cokes” and I'd agree.
Hi Dave
So glad to read your post. I was a coke junkie as well, and stopped 9 mos ago. One of the best things I have done in my life. I loved drinking cokes and thought it was so cool to have one big one first thing in the morning. But my blood sugar was 145 and diagnosed pre diabetic. Stopped all soda, removed sugar and carbs from diet, added some exercise, and viola Blood sugar 98 yesterday! I lost 50 lbs, and off of all meds!! How I did this was, well, I just decided to and kept a food log of everything I ate/drank and had a weekly weigh in check in. So lets both keep doing what works!!!
David, that's another strategy they talk about in the book: identity. You are now the kind of person who doesn't drink cokes. Brilliant. I did that when I switched to organic food. Another one that the local food movement has used to get people to join in is to come up with the word locavore. Now it's very chic in some circles to be a locavore, i.e., eat mostly food that is grown within 100 miles of where you live.
OMG Patty, I am so THRILLED that you commented. I found your pajama
post a few days ago – can't remember if I commented – and became a fan
immediately. You made me want to wear pajamas in public — except I
do, sort of. I wear super comfy clothes like bike shorts and t-shirts
and [TMI folks, sorry] I sleep in them. It helps not to have a job.
I'm heading over to your blog to comment right NOW. 🙂
Thank you for visiting, Hannah [love that name]! Believe me, I know
exactly how hard it is to change habits. That's why I'm so glad I
found the book Switch. Borrowed it from the library but I think I'm
going to spring for a copy I can keep, highlight and write in the
margins.
Good idea about the running clothes on the desk. Reminds me that I
used to have everything ready before bed so I could do that old Jane
Fonda workout tape as soon as I woke up. I prefer yoga now. Hmm. You
made me think!
Thank you so much, Trece! You are such an amazing cheerleader. I
really appreciate your encouragement and support. 🙂
Good one, Yolanda. Think I'll steal that. 🙂
Thanks so much for the Wahoo! I was stewing in a pit of despair the last few days, but writing that list of what I've already done really made me feel good. And so did the Wahoo.
OMG Patty, I am so THRILLED that you commented. I found your pajama
post a few days ago – can't remember if I commented – and became a fan
immediately. You made me want to wear pajamas in public — except I
do, sort of. I wear super comfy clothes like bike shorts and t-shirts
and [TMI folks, sorry] I sleep in them. It helps not to have a job.
I'm heading over to your blog to comment right NOW. 🙂
Thank you for visiting, Hannah [love that name]! Believe me, I know
exactly how hard it is to change habits. That's why I'm so glad I
found the book Switch. Borrowed it from the library but I think I'm
going to spring for a copy I can keep, highlight and write in the
margins.
Good idea about the running clothes on the desk. Reminds me that I
used to have everything ready before bed so I could do that old Jane
Fonda workout tape as soon as I woke up. I prefer yoga now. Hmm. You
made me think!
Thank you so much, Trece! You are such an amazing cheerleader. I
really appreciate your encouragement and support. 🙂
Yes, lists and habits can really make a difference.
If I make a list, I usually add the reasons why I do them, or what will happen if I don't to put a little extra fuel into the motivation-tank.
Or I promise someone else in order to have someone check on me. Because it is simpler to avoid my tasks on my own.
I quit drinking coffee. I poured all the coffee in the bin to get rid of it. There is one container that I still have that reeks of coffee – and not in a good way.
Whenever I feel like a coffee, the smell of that container really puts me off. I haven't had a coffee for nearly two months now! I feel a lot better – can sleep easier, no caffeine highs and low- it's better all round!
First off… Here is your warm, well-deserved, full-of-love pat on the back.
I'm always trying to drink more water. I won't let myself have a cup of coffee until I down a 12 oz glass of water. Often, by the time I finish the water, I don't feel like the coffee. And that's a good thing.
If I feel overwhelmed by chores or a project or a task, I set the timer for 10 minutes, and see how much I can get done. Many times, I've almost completed the chore in 10 minutes, so I keep going until I can cross it off the list. I am reminded that those tedious chores never really take as long as I think they are going to.
Thank you, Jesse! Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.
That timer trick works wonders. I try not to use it as often as possible
because, you know, I might get something done. 😉
Same here to the 750 words – now I am a proud Flamingo on my way to Phoenix! 🙂
A Flamingo in Phoenix, the Firebird. I'd love to see that!