In Make Customers Love You

Being yourself is a rather paradoxical thing.
Michelle Nickolaisen
It’s easier by far than faking it all the time – so much extra effort! But it’s also incredibly scary: you’re putting yourself out there, in an intense, vulnerable way. And if someone comes along and stomps all over you, they’re definitely stomping on you, and not a constructed facade.

But! Being yourself is totally, totally necessary.

It’s necessary for you.

Sure, being you can be easier in some ways, and harder in others, than acting like someone else. However, there’s another key thing to consider: being yourself is exhilarating. Being someone else is exhausting.

It’s the difference between wearing the outfit you love that makes you look & feel amazing and boosts your confidence sky high. And wearing those professional-but-ungodly-itchy wool pants, that cut into your stomach after a few hours because the fit isn’t quite right.

Which one of those sounds like more fun?
More importantly, which one of those sounds more sustainable?
Yeah. That’s what I thought.

It’s necessary for your customers.

Even on the internet, people can tell a facade from the real deal. And in a world full of facades, we crave – absolutely, mouthwateringly, viscerally crave – the real deal.

People can’t connect with a facade. And they certainly won’t feel loved by one.

It’s necessary for your business.

As Catherine Caine likes to say, you are not unique. Rare and wonderful and amazing, yes. But there are other people out there who share your quirks, your obsessions, your loves, and who will get it when you alternately sprinkle your writing with references to Project Runway/Buffy/Star Wars.

They’ll get it, and they’ll get you.

That sort of intimate connection fosters trust. And love. They’ll love yo, you’ll love them, it’ll be one big happy love fest. Picture Woodstock, but cleaner and with fewer drugs.

All of this love & trust & connection makes for one hell of a strong bedrock for a business.

I feel you. Being you can be downright terrifying. Especially if you’ve had the painful experience of putting yourself out there and being smacked down or laughed at or any number of things that can happen. But despite the potential (and it’s important to remember that these are potential – people are never as mean as we think they will be) downsides, being you is the only choice to make. For yourself, for your customers, for your business, it’s the best choice all around.

Bonus: It’s also the most fun choice. Which makes it a total no-brainer.

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Showing 7 comments
  • Delisa
    Reply

    The term Fake ’till you make it, makes me what to vomit. You can’t be awesome when you’re trying to be someone else.

    • Michelle
      Reply

      Yes! Faking it is always a bad idea. ALWAYS.

  • Courtney
    Reply

    This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:

    “Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting.”

    But then again – what is normal?

    Thanks for the reminder to be myself! It’s not only less exhausting, it’s more fun and more profitable.

    • Michelle
      Reply

      Normal is a dishwasher setting 😉 Thank you for your comment Courtney, glad you liked the post 😀

  • Cotton Candy
    Reply

    This reminded me of Danielle LaPorte’s writing—distilling the essence of the point & presenting it in the fewest words necessary yet achieving a crystal clear, powerful, & inspiring picture. Great job Michelle! ^_^

    @Courtney: It reminded me of one of my favorite quotes too! “You are unique. Just like every body else.”

    • Michelle
      Reply

      Wow, thank you Cotton Candy! Being compared to Danielle LaPorte is quite the compliment 😀 I’m glad you liked the post!

  • Cotton Candy
    Reply

    Also would like to mention in regards to “And if someone comes along and stomps all over you, they’re definitely stomping on you, and not a constructed facade.”

    I can’t find or remember where I read it, but I swear I’ve read something about not worrying about this, at least with comments, because the people who love you will stand up & defend you or at least be there to provide support.

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